And This is the Part Where You Ask Moscow Things
by bartonistic
Summary: Guess what everyone's favorite capital city is doing? ANSWERING QUESTIONS. Yeah, that's right, Moscow's gonna answer all of your questions so send 'em in and he'll wheel 'em and deal 'em. RATED T FOR LANGUAGE.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey there, this is Nico.**

**I've decided that since there's been a very large amount of 'ask such-and-such' fics in the Hetalia fandom, I would like to bring in my own little gem, MR. MOSCOW~**

**Here's a little info sheet for this rascal:**

**WARNING: THIS WILL CONTAIN HARSH LANGUAGE.**

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**NAME** Dmitri Braginsky, The City of Moscow

**GENDER** Male

**AGE** (he stopped counting in 1712, after having his name changed from Muscovy to Moscow)

**APPEARANCE **Dmitri looks a lot like how you wouldn't expect him to look. His natural hair color is a sandy kind of beige blond, which he maintains on the top portion of his hair. The bottom half is died pitch black in a fashion that sort of crawls into the beige-blond atop his head in a jagged tooth sort of manner. He usually spikes his hair forward (see also Zayn Malik [don't worry, all you haters, I'm not a fan or a hater of 1D, I just imagine Moscow's hair in that sort of hair style]) and doesn't do much else. His eyes are the same color as Ivan's, that deep purple that seems to bore into your soul. His skin is pale, but not overly so, just pigmented enough to pass as normal. He, being the saucy rebel that he is, has a series of piercings, one on the left side of his lip, one on his tongue, one on his nose, and one on his eyebrow. He's been considering getting some sort of earrings, but doesn't really find appeal in having gauges.

Dmitri finds a lot of comfort in dressing in button downs and plaid and whatnot. However, he does enjoy being "high fashion" every once in a while, so don't be surprised if you find him wearing Alexander McQueen and generally being a one man fashion show. He's always been this way about everything, comfortable with one thing but completely willing to do the opposite of it on a moments notice.

**PERSONALITY **Dmitri has always been a tad rebellious and that hasn't changed in all his years of being Moscow. Now, don't get me wrong, even if he is rebellious, Dmitri is also classy as fuck. He likes art and music and history and languages and literature because they're all so intellectual and _wow, holy fuck, architecture is the best because it really shows a lot about the culture and history of a country and all that other boring shit Siberia cares nothing about. (_I guess that's what you get for being the "Third Rome".) Dmitri is also very Western, ranging from his retailing all the way to his people's lifestyles. Another thing that just attributes to his personality, is his high maintenance level. He's always been high maintenance and what city wouldn't be if they had the highest number of billionaires in the world living in them?

On the other side of his classy motherfucker personality is his sarcastic witty bastard personality. He's one person with a lot of shit he's dealt with and what better way to hash out his feelings than through sarcasm? He spends his time reading satirical literature and usually spends his time shooting off-handed comments about the government to Ivan. Now why would Moscow sarcastically insult his own government? The answer is simple. He does that (and every other country, city, state, province, whatever does too) because he is a being that is a reflection of himself and the people who inhabit him. He reciprocates what the majority wants because he is who he is because of those who call him home, not because of the people who govern him.

**RELATIONSHIPS **Dmitri is a pretty friendly guy so he has no qualms with being friends with absolutely anyone. On the other hand, he has people who he absolutely, for the life of him, cannot fucking stand. The people who he happens to be really close friends with (like I'm-gonna-invite-myself-to-your-house-text-you-incoherent-and-stupid-things-call-you-a-dumbass-cry-on-your-shoulder-and-force-you-to-piggy-back-me close) are Minnesota, Alaska, Florida, New York, Berlin, Rome, and London. For some reason, he's always felt like it's okay to be a total cunt around his friends - because usually when he's a cunt other people give him shit for it - since they just act like cunts back. He's always loved his friends and has always stood by them and all inside jokes aside ("Because the Earth is round, Minnesota.") he knows he can trust them.

He's always had really good pseudo-sibling relationships with his fellow cities. He usually spends his time bothering Siberia with artsy shit and what not. He's always described Siberia as "you know that one bitch who's so anal retentive it's ridiculous? Like, they have their head so far up their ass they can't see their feet? Yeah, that bitch." He usually hangs out with Volgograd, his giant grease monkey of sibling. His other relationships with his siblings are pretty... family-like, but Siberia has always been - and always will be - his favorite sibling to bother.

Finally on this list are the people who Dmitri truly hates, like I-wanna-rip-out-your-intestines-and-jump-rope-with-them hates. First and foremost on this list is Shanghai. Now, you may be wondering, why Shanghai? Don't Russia and China have a "super gr9" relationship? Sure, those two may like each other but Moscow cannot stand Shanghai. He never really stopped to wonder why he hates Shanghai, he just knows he does. Shanghai is like that one person you hate just because they exist and everything they do annoys you. Don't act like you don't feel that way about someone because you know you do.

Second on the list - and coming ridiculously close to first - is California. Moscow can give you a reason for this bitch, yes. One day, Moscow - as well as the states, provinces, and other cities - came to a world meeting. Moscow, being the friendly ass bitch he is, decided to introduce himself to the other people there. He gets to California and smiles real bright and sticks out his hand and goes the whole nine. He's regarded with a: "Yeah, no. I don't _associate _myself with _trash_." Moscow could've slapped a bitch right then and there. Who the fuck calls him trash? Bitch, the Byzantine Empire was all on his shit because he was so goddamn classy and beautiful. What did this bitch get? A bunch of sweaty miners with a gold issue? Bitch, _please_.

Now there are other people, Moscow has a distaste for, but only really, really, really hates Shanghai and California. Now, more power to you if you like those two, but Moscow just can't bring himself to.

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**Annnnnnnd, end author's note.**

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So.

Yeah.

This is awkward.

I'm on the internet asking random people to ask me things.

So, yeah.

Do it.

For science.

And other important cultural stuff and what not.

Yeah.

- Moscow


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Okay guys, it's time to start with this shindig, woop woop~**

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_**From:**_

_**wow**_

_**uh**_

_**Hello I am angelic and I would like to say you are awesome!**_

_**1) why do you not like california considering I am from there?**_  
_**2) Respect the awesome Prussia**_  
_**that is all. lol**_

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Hey there, Angelic! Thanks for the compliment, you seem pretty awesome, too. :)

Well, here's the thing, I've seen the good parts and all the nice things California has done, and I've seen all the good and bad aspects of this dude. We're actually a lot alike. The thing is, is that he can only manage to be irritatingly bitchy to me. I mean, it's like, he has no capability of being nice to me. He can be nice to absolutely anyone else (save Florida, since they just argue about DisneyWorld vs DisneyLand and Hollywood vs Hollywood and it's like sHUT UP.) but me. Please don't take it personal, I bet Cali's awesome.

Prussia's got all my respect, yo. He's actually one of the more awesome people I know.

It was nice answering your questions!

Thanks,

Dmitri

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Keep sending your questions in, I'd love to hear from all of you.

EVERYDAY IS TMI TUESDAY, JUST SAYING.

- Dmitri

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**A/N: Send in more questions and I might just make Mr. Moscow here, tell y'all who he's crushing on. ;D**

**Dmitri: SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH, NICO.**

**Me: Kesesesesese~**

**Dmitri: That's Prussia's thing, you fuck.**

**Me: w/e w/e I do what I want**


End file.
